A student-operated publication at Santa Rosa Junior College.

The Oak Leaf

A student-operated publication at Santa Rosa Junior College.

The Oak Leaf

A student-operated publication at Santa Rosa Junior College.

The Oak Leaf

It’s not love, just a crush

My heart flutters; I feel frustration, sometimes sadness and confusion. I’ve come to realize I have a crush, and it’s something I’ve never felt before.

A crush is an intense but usually short-lived infatuation.

It started with an instant attraction. I saw him and he sparked my interest. I don’t know if it was because of what he was wearing, his personality or how he looked at me.

Everything he does is perfection and his flaws are invisible. Crushes are the center of your life whether you like it or not.

It’s exactly how I feel.

Thoughts of that person run rampant. At times it’s hard to function. I do anything to distract myself. Everything he does is amazing.

Although this person is so darn cute, I wonder if he thinks about me? “Does he like me? Do we have a chance?”

I can’t help but think this infatuation is fueled by how far the distance is between us, and I’ve only talked to him twice.

I mean, if I had a car and I got the green light, would I jet down there in a heartbeat? Yes, of course.

But then reality sets in and I know I have a life to live.

I feel like a 15-year-old girl infatuated with Justin Bieber. It’s weird. Sometimes I think, “What’s wrong with me?”

I feel like a teenager. I didn’t know it was possible for a 21-year-old guy to feel like this. Yeah, I’ve liked people before, but not borderline obsessive. The only other person I’ve felt even close to this about is when I was 14 years old, and in love with Disney’s Raven-Symone.

At times I wonder if I need help, but then I think no, it’s something that will pass eventually. One day, I’ll be sane again.

The advice I’ve received: “Get over this person, move on and keep your options open.”

But as much as those thoughts and comments circulate in my mind, it’s easier said than done.

With everything throughout this process, I’ve been positive and I’ve embraced these feelings.

Whatever happens when I see him again happens. I’m ready.

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About the Contributor
Robert Marshall
Robert Marshall, Senior Staff Writer

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