What is it about our culture that makes us want one person and one person only? Or think that is what we want. Or believe that is what we should want. Do we really want it?

Certainly there is no end to the movies, shows, books and poetry that tell us we have one special someone out there. From Plato to The Bachelor, everywhere we turn, someone is saying we need to marry, grow old with and die next to one person.

Are we just too scared to be alone that we try our hardest to commit, but invariably stray?

I have a slew of girlfriends that have been cheated on. And some that have cheated. Or complained “He won’t commit.” Or can’t themselves say “Yes!” to, “Promise you won’t sleep with anyone else?” That is what it is about, right?

Or is it?

What does it really mean to be with someone? Are you allowed to have close personal friendships and be emotionally attached to others when you have a partner? It’s okay if you already know the guy, but what if you have a boyfriend, and then you meet this other dude, and you become friends and hang out? What does the boyfriend say? “What does he have that I don’t have” and “Are you going to sleep with him?”

Isn’t emotional cheating almost worse than the physical kind? Because if you get close to another person, then what could come out of that?

So, then you have to come to the harsh reality that commitment and monogamy are basically code words for ownership. “He is mine, not yours.” I guess it makes sense, we do live in a capitalist society; we own cars, houses, cell phones and our boyfriends.